Have you ever been lost? I remember once, years ago, walking the dogs on an unfamiliar trail in Concord, and suddenly discovering that I was lost. No worries. It was a nice enough day and I forged ahead, finding and following a wide trail in what I thought was likely the right direction.

It was not. I did end up figuring out – eventually – where I was and I found my way back, but I expended a lot of time and energy in the effort. It was good that the conditions that day were not too trying.

Actually, what I did is fairly common "lost person behavior." Most of us, when we first find ourselves in a place we did not expect and do not recognize, tend to keep moving forward. Very seldom, according to the research, are we likely to stay put or backtrack, which would be the most rational and efficient way to spend our time until we are able to orient ourselves once again.

This is not only true of those of us who occasionally get lost in the woods. We all get lost in life, figuratively if not actually, at some time or another. There are days when we look around only to find ourselves in a wholly unexpected and unwelcome place in our lives. There are moments when disaster strikes and everything that was once familiar appears to have disappeared. At times such as these we can feel bewildered, confused, afraid, alone and aghast.

Research shows that most of us, when this kind of thing first happens, often seem to deny that we are disoriented at all. We try to pretend everything is okay and to move along the route that we had planned, even though it is no longer in available to us. As we move forward, often with an increasing sense of urgency, we may finally begin to acknowledge that, yes, well, maybe in fact we are in unfamiliar territory. With that recognition can come feelings of shame or embarrassment (how could this happen to us?). Sometimes, when we finally do acknowledge that we are lost, we panic and begin to behave somewhat frantically and unproductively. And things usually tend to get worse from there. At least before they start to get better again.

Many religions encourage us to look to the young children in our midst for wisdom, and that can be especially true when we're talking about "lost person behavior." As it turns out, children under 6, when lost, despite their extreme vulnerability, tend to have the highest survival rate of any age cohort. When they become lost, they tend to stay put. They don't have a "vision" of what might lie beyond the horizon, so there is little to draw them forward. When they get cold, they tend to find someplace warm to hole up. When they are tired, they sleep. When they are thirsty, they drink. As Laurence Gonzales, author of Deep Survival, has written, "They try to make themselves comfortable, and staying comfortable helps keep them alive."

I think there is a lesson in that for all of us. No matter what crisis any one of us may be facing in our lives at this very moment, let us not forget to take care of our own basic needs. Doing so can keep us going until help arrives, or until circumstances change, or until we manage somehow to find ourselves out of whatever mess we are in. "We like to think that education and experience make us more competent, more capable. But it seems that the opposite is sometimes true." Sometimes when we're in trouble, it's better just to follow our very basic instincts – to eat and to rest and to take care of ourselves.

Let's keep taking care of ourselves and one another, and we will get through.

See you in church!
Rev. Wendy